


forget where we were.

by gavinsaleks (ohmaggies)



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF, Sugar Pine 7 RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Magic, Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, Friends to Lovers, Immortality, M/M, Necromancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-23
Updated: 2017-11-23
Packaged: 2019-02-05 22:20:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12803610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohmaggies/pseuds/gavinsaleks
Summary: ' “He might… he might not be the same when he comes back. It'll be him but you have to remember that he died and we're pulling him back from the other side. It will be him but maybe not all of him.”Jeremy looks at the necromancer for a second, closes his eyes behind his dark shades, and nods for a short second. “That's fine.”He thinks about how empty his bank account is, how lonely their house feels, the cold and dread, and realises it's fine. It's not fine, but it feels fine.And, it does feels fine, until Parker opens his eyes.'supernatural au / parker dies and jeremy contacts a necromancer to bring his roommate back. but, nothing really works out the way he thought it would've.





	forget where we were.

**Author's Note:**

> because I'm a sucker for supernatural-ish au's and the new sp7 vid has me fucked up :(((( 
> 
> title from 'i forget where we were' by ben howard which I listened to a lot writing this ! 
> 
> \- rachel.

Jeremy starts sleepwalking after Parker dies, turning all the lights on in his sleep, sometimes he wakes up far from home and has to find his way back. He tells Steven that he doesn't care, that he misses Parker paying rent and that's all, but every morning he turns the corner to the kitchen and has to stop expecting to not be alone.

 

He avoids Parker's bedroom altogether, passes it once to pull the door shut and half expects to see it not empty. Maybe he lingers, grasps the cold of the doorknob and squeezes so hard it hurts, but it doesn't bring Parker back. Sometimes, all the time, he remembers that nothing will.

 

Say he's been going to their favourite spot because he has a dream that Parker's waiting here for him, and say his heart drops so far that he's worried it won't be the same. That _he_ won't be.

 

They don't tell Andrew, or Jeremy forgets to mention it even though he hasn't stopped thinking about it for long enough to forget. Everything feels different with Parker gone even though nothing has really changed; rent's too much, and he stops hanging out with Parker's friends because they never really liked him much anyway, but everyone else acts like it didn't happen.

 

Like, they don't care. And, maybe they don't.

 

He goes to the library once a week and contacts mediums online to see if they can talk to Parker somehow, and it fills a void in him that he didn't even know was there. He doesn't tell anyone because Steven was Parker's friend, not his, and besides, he doesn't care much for them.

 

He has a recurring dream where he's home the night Parker dies and Cib ends up dead instead. Survivor's guilt, if it can even be called that, leaves him numb, almost. He falls asleep trying not to think about Parker dying alone but dreams about it every night, and he wakes up and Google's things that help settle his nerves.

 

 **Google search:** _why do all my friends keep dying?_

 

A necromancer contacts him three weeks later, promising to bring back Parker if Jeremy can pay. He considers how much rent is and how much he doesn't want to lose this place, and messages back almost immediately saying he's willing to pay whatever.

 

They need something of Parker's and a couple hundred dollars, and Jeremy wonders when he became the kind of guy that did something for a dead someone he didn't even like when they were alive.

 

 **Google search:** _how to tell you like someone._

 

Jeremy's not a grave digger, and he never thought he'd be standing in a graveyard next to a guy dressed all in black robes staring at his friend's gravestone. He's holding a shovel and it's dark out but he still has his sunglasses on. Underneath where he's standing is Parker's body; probably decaying, most definitely dead, but he doesn't care in the moment, digs his shovel into thick dirt and thinks about seeing Parker again.

 

_Alive._

 

The necromancer starts talking, says he brought back someone's dog last week and it was a lot easier than robbing people from their grave at night. Jeremy stands beside him and doesn't say anything, just digs his shovel into the dirt and starts digging.

 

“Parker your brother or something?”

 

Jeremy doesn't say anything, but turns his head to look at them through black lenses and then looks back at Parker's grave.

 

A pause. “... Boyfriend?”

 

He stills for a moment but doesn't answer, again, and presses his foot against the shovel to press it further into the dirt. Conversation has never been one of his selling points, and he’d much rather focus on trying to dig up his roommate's body before the sun starts to rise. He's weird, maybe, but even he doesn't want to be caught robbing a body from a grave.

 

The Necromancer places a cold hand on Jeremy's shoulder then pulls it back, his smile evident in his voice. “It's cool, man. I get it.”

 

Jeremy shakes dirt off his foot, thinks about how just those words make him miss Parker even more- how it sounds like something he would say- and doesn't answer.

 

_

 

It's a couple hundred dollars and one of Parker's old shirts that brings him back to life. It's early on a Tuesday morning and Jeremy is staring at his roommate's dead body, face blank but his heart beating fast enough he can almost hear it in his ears.

 

“He might… he might not be the same when he comes back. It'll be him but you have to remember that he died and we're pulling him back from the other side against his will. It will be him but maybe not all of him.”

 

Jeremy looks at the necromancer for a second, closes his eyes behind his dark shades, and nods for a short second. “That's fine.”

 

 **Google search:** _how to tell someone your friend died and you want to see him again without letting them know you miss him more than you would've thought._

 

He thinks about how empty his bank account is, how lonely their house feels, the cold and dread that he had felt going into Parker's room to get the shirt to bring him back, and realises it's fine. It's not fine, but it feels fine.

 

And, it does feels fine, until Parker opens his eyes.

 

_

 

The car ride home is quiet, Jeremy's shades protecting his eyes from the soft morning light. Parker is sitting beside him, hands rubbing warmth into his arms; there's a look behind his eyes that Jeremy can't place, that he can't be sure isn't just a figment of his imagination. Parker's alive, that's all that matters for now, and he knows he should feel guilty for bringing him back but he isn't sure he can be.

 

“Thanks.”

 

Parker's voice is quiet but it's his- though raw and unused- a movement of his head to look beside him shaking dirt into his lap. Nothing's perfect, maybe, but Jeremy feels the smallest hint of something warm spread through his chest and he keeps his focus on the road but nods.

 

He stops at a red light and loosens his grip on the steering wheel, allowing himself to look at Parker. Parker's looking at him, face soft and bruised, but he's not dead anymore. Jeremy thinks he'd take this dead, sore and confused version of his roommate over the one that's buried in a graveyard.

 

“For what?” he manages.

 

The light turns green and he takes the right street to go home. In his pocket, his phone starts to vibrate, but he ignores it. Focuses instead on Parker staring at him as he drives, dried blood caked on his face and smudges of dirt everywhere. No matter what, nothing will go back to normal now. But, he thinks, at least he has Parker, that means more than the normalcy he missed.

 

“Just… thanks.”

 

Jeremy understands, he does, and he doesn't press any further. Just helps Parker get out of the car, turns the shower on for him, and unlocks the door to his room. It's the second time it's been open in the last 24 hours but Jeremy looks inside, thinks about how he can do this now because it's not going to be empty anymore.

 

He waits for Parker in the kitchen, hands wrapped around a warm mug, and watches the way he drifts uneasily around the room. Maybe it feels wrong at first, him all clean and breathing, but Jeremy considers the alternative and knows he would pick this every time. Parker, alive though movements slow, and Jeremy, watching him carefully.

 

He leaves his new-old roommate to get acquainted to the house and goes to bed, and he sleeps better in those few hours of daylight napping than he has in too long.

 

_

 

“I remember dying,” Parker says that afternoon.

 

Jeremy's turned the corner to get a cup of coffee and his heart stops dead in his throat, remembering for a moment all those days he woke up and there was no one else but Andrew, and that was only sometimes. He stands in place for a moment and stares, tries his to imagine how this would've felt had he have not brought Parker back. It would've been the same as before, maybe worse, and he pulls himself together and walks to the sink.

 

“It all just kinda goes dark after that, you know? Then I'm awake and I have a headache, and there's a stranger's face too close to mine. And I'm, I'm in a graveyard and I've been murdered. But, I'm alive. B-because of you.”

 

“Is that all you remember?”

 

Parker goes to say something but changes his mind, the words dying in his throat.

 

James is suddenly aware of how much he missed just seeing Parker sitting at the table, how much he missed his voice and how curly his hair gets sometimes when he washes it, and he makes him a cup of tea while he's leaning against the counter. It feels odd but familiar, and he sits across from Parker and hands him a drink, and Parker smiles at him.

 

“It was dark,” he says, then. “I just remember thinking I was gonna die then- then nothing.”

 

Jeremy watches him, his clean face and clothes, and how scared he looks. Like an animal trapped in a corner, or a boy who was murdered by his friend then brought back to life by his roommate. Then, he looks at Jeremy and his face brightens, relief clear on his face. Jeremy doesn't smile back but he doesn't look away, either.

 

“Thank you for bringing me back. I don't know if I said that earlier or not but, it's miserable being dead.”

 

“Don't thank me.” His voice is cold, cool, but Parker looks at him wide-eyed and he almost has the heart to regret saying it.

 

“I mean it, Jeremy. I was dead and now I'm alive, and it's because of you.”

 

One day, Jeremy realises, Parker will realise he was probably better off dead. That Jeremy brought him back because he's selfish, because the house was quiet and Parker's room felt like a dead thing sitting in the corner, and he doesn't deserve gratitude. Parker can't have a normal life; and he'll always remember dying without knowing why at his friend's hand.

 

“It's fine.”

 

That word again, this time louder in the large room, occupied by Jeremy and someone who shouldn't be there. Someone, like Parker, whose body was meant to stay in that grave forever.

 

Still, Jeremy can't find a way to regret bringing him back.

 

_

 

Parker gets used to talking about being dead. It's slow but eventually, he starts asking about the funeral, who showed up and who didn't, and if Cib and the others took responsibility for his death.

 

Jeremy tells him what he knows; how they tried to pin the murder on him, that someone's been putting flowers on his grave, that Steven and the others were more worried about being caught. It's painful and true, and Parker listens and plays with one of the buttons on his shirt. He gives Jeremy a watery smile and excuses himself, and Jeremy doesn't follow him because he knows he needs time.

 

It's three in the morning the next day that Jeremy wakes to knocking on his door. It's quiet and uneven, like whoever's doing it hasn't made up their mind on whether or not it's a good idea.

 

Parker's standing there when Jeremy opens the door, still in his jeans and t-shirt, and Jeremy steps aside to let him in without asking what he wants. Parker's stumbling over his words, trying to force a laugh, and the look on his face is painful enough that Jeremy finds himself interrupting.

 

“What do you want?” It's not harsh, just honest. He's tired and still half-asleep, and Parker breathes out shakily and smiles uneasily.

 

“Can I sleep in here? I had a bad dream the other night and now I can't sleep and I can go if you want-”

 

Jeremy manages a quiet, “yes,” and Parker's tense shoulders instantly relax. He looks better, healthier now than he did days ago, and he sits down at the foot of the bed nervously. He still looks unconvinced, hair messy but not enough that he's been sleeping, and Jeremy watches him for a moment before patting the space next to him.

  
Parker looks at him, eyes wide but sad, and crawls the short distance. He doesn't bother tucking himself under the blanket that Jeremy has on, just pulls his knees almost to his chest and stares out Jeremy's window, their backs almost pressed together. It's more intimate that Jeremy's used to but he rolls over, presses his head to his pillow, and falls asleep nearly instantly.

_

 

He wakes later that morning next to Parker's soft snoring, the blanket over him more than Jeremy. It feels weird to think about- _this-_ and how they weren't nearly this close when Parker was alive the first time. Still, Jeremy thinks about how much he missed having someone else around who wasn't Andrew and knows he'd choose Parker every time. Before or after he brought him back.

 

Parker stirs, coarse whispers forced between his lips, and he looks peaceful but troubled. Jeremy wonders about his bad dreams and if they're nearly as bad as the ones he had when Parker was dead; the ones that were because he felt guilty and the house felt cold, and his sleep became more restless and dreaded than it ever had been.

 

He watches Parker instead of shaking him awake and hears his name muttered, evaluating the situation before he decides against staying and goes to make himself something for breakfast.

 

He's drinking a warm cup of coffee when he hears light footsteps behind him, and hears a nervous hello. Parker's still getting used to beinf alive and Jeremy makes a small noise in his throat that means the same back even though he doesn't say it; he sips his drink and watches Parker move around the room in the reflection of the window. He always has this look on his face like he's been hit and Jeremy follows his movements for a few minutes before turning to glance at him.

 

“Bad dream?”

 

Parker's holding the TV remote, hair tousled from sleep and shirt wrinkled. He looks like he's surprised he's being spoken to, then eventually nods. “Uh, yeah. Been happening since I came back. Most nights-”

 

“Most?”

 

“ _Every_ night,” he corrects, words hollow. He looks just as young as he used to but there's a knowing look behind his eyes that doesn't quite make sense, and Jeremy looks at his coffee instead. “I haven't been sleeping just in case I have another one but sleeping in your room last night helped. I should- I should thank you for that. I still had a bad dream but I guess it was nice falling asleep knowing I wasn't by myself.”

 

Jeremy thinks about death, how technically Parker slept alone for a long time while he was dead, and decided against saying anything. Just stirs his drink and let's his eyes drift to the news on the television.

 

“So, thanks,” Parker continues. “It really did help.”

 

“What do you dream about, Parker?” Jeremy's own words are out before he can stop them, looking away from the news to where Parker is now sitting at the coffee table. “Cib?”

 

A soft laugh, pained but almost sadly genuine. “Mostly about dying, or remembering that I left the oven on or something and my body will burn and disintegrate before anyone finds me. Sometimes I'm trapped in my coffin running out of air or you dig my body up and can't bring me back. Stupid stuff but, I can't stop dreaming about it. Guess it what happens when you're meant to be dead, huh?”

 

“You said my name. This morning.”

 

“Yeah, that, uh,” he breathes out, looking down at his lap. “First time I've had that dream so I don't remember it well but. But, you died. I think. And I couldn't bring you back or save you.”

 

Jeremy nods and drinks more of his drink, and tries not to focus on how much he's hurt Parker by bringing him back like this; trapped between alive and dead, knowing that he died and no one cared but the creepy roommate he kept his distance from most of the time. It feels wrong but having him back feels right, like the smallest shred of normalcy returned to them, and he looks at Parker, _breathing_ , and is glad he brought him back.

 

_

 

 **Google search:** _bad dream remedy._

 

___

 

Something about the maturity in Parker's face doesn't fit quite right on him. He's young looking and dresses casually, but there's something old in his eyes that Jeremy can't pinpoint; he looks like he's seen too much, and Jeremy knows he has but he avoids looking straight at him. Part of him assumes it's his fault and part of him knows it is, because he didn't look like that before.

 

It was only when he brought him back from the dead.

 

The waitress takes their order and Parker adjusts his hat on his head, looks outside the clear window at the traffic passing on the street. It feels like old times, which is what they both want in some unspoken way, but Jeremy knows it can't ever be the same.

 

They're friends now, close because Jeremy dug up his body and resurrected it, and it feels odd in some way that Parker's probably only sticking around because of it. Jeremy knows he's not exactly going to run back to Steven and the others but he still wonders if the moment they came looking for him, he'd leave.

 

Parker thanks the waitress and takes his milkshake, gaze redirected back to the window.

 

“It's weird to think about, that the world just kept going on when I died,” he says, wistfully. And there's that look in his eye again. “That no one really cared about it. Nothing just stopped because I wasn't here anymore. The world didn't stop.”

 

“Mine did.”

 

It's honest, maybe too much so, but Jeremy looks at Parker, at the way his eyebrows draw down when he turns to look at him. He missed him, his life didn't feel the same without him, he was going to have to move house and rent elsewhere, he stopped seeing Steven and his friends, Andrew hung around less often. When Parker died, a lot of things ended.

 

“Thanks for trying to make me feel less insignificant,” Parker tries, but Jeremy knows he wants to say something else. He looks curious and in pain, an uncomfortable smile pressed on his face.

 

For a moment, Jeremy wonders if he said too much. If he should've just agreed and nodded like he understood, but instead he starts eating his breakfast before it gets cold and nudges the boy across from him to do the same. It's not normal for them but it must be now; Jeremy isn't the creepy roommate, he's the only person who cared enough to find a way to bring Parker back, and he figures that must mean something. At least maybe enough to make them friends.

 

Breakfast gets cold and Parker sips at the straw of his milkshake until there's nothing left, then Jeremy puts the money on the table and they leave. The cars that Parker was looking at before have thinned and Parker pauses outside the diner for a moment before following Jeremy to the crossing.

 

 **Google search:** _am I selfish for bringing my friend back to life even though he can't have a life because he should be dead._

 

“I keep thinking about it, like, if I can die. If I get hit going across the road and it would kill a normal person, would it kill me.”

 

“You think you might be immortal?”

 

“It sounds stupid out loud,” Parker admits, lowering his head to avoid the sun. “But I don't have a lot else to think about. Just about Cib and Sami Jo, and what must've happened while I was dead.”

 

“... Not a lot.”

 

“Yeah, just my funeral.” It's offered up with humour but there's a serious edge to his words that has Jeremy turning to look at him. “Did you go?”

 

“Yes.”

 

A pause, the next sentence only said after he's considered it for almost a minute. “What was it like?”

 

Jeremy shrugs but answers not in the way Parker wants, but the way where he isn't lying to him. “Boring.”

 

If Parker is surprised or upset, he doesn't show it.

 

_

 

Jeremy wakes up to Parker knocking on his door at one in the morning, pulling the warmth of his blanket off him to open his door. Parker's in his pajamas but his hair is almost tidy and his eyes are red, and Jeremy can't tell if he's been crying or if he's just tired but he lets him in anyway.

 

“What do you want?”

 

Parker looks around Jeremy's room then settles on looking at him. He looks scared, again, and when he talks, his voice talks, not from the cold in the room but his own anxiety.  “You mind if I sleep here again? It's just- I keep thinking about stuff and I don't want to sleep by myself.”

 

Jeremy nods.

 

_

 

Parker's not in bed the next time Jeremy wakes up, leaning up instantly to look around before hearing the television playing in the living room and relaxing. It's some news program and advertisements that Jeremy's probably seen a hundred times over, but he still gets up tiredly and makes his way to the lounge.

 

Parker looks at him like a deer caught in the headlights when he enters, two steaming cups of coffee in his hands.

 

“Oh, hey. I was just about to bring this to you.” He adds, “To thank you for paying for breakfast yesterday,” slowly, like it was an afterthought.

 

“You don't need to thank me,” Jeremy replies, taking the warm cup as it's passed to him. The smell of bitter coffee wakes him almost immediately, raising it to his lips to take a careful sip before smiling briefly at Parker, who moves and accidentally knocks a book off the table.

 

It feels, he realises, like having a ghost living in his house. He saw a medium a few days after Parker died who said something similar; that there was something around Jeremy, something dead, and that it was looking out for him. At the time, he hadn't believed it, but now he thinks about how cold he'd felt those days after Parker and how maybe it makes more sense than he'd originally thought.

 

“Do you remember anything after you died?”

 

Parker smiles at him in confusion, sliding the book back where it came from. “I've told you before, I only remember waking up when you brought me back.”

 

“You're lying.”

 

“Why would I lie to you? You brought me back.”

 

Jeremy puts his coffee cup down, pulling out a chair to sit down; Parker looks worried, and he's backed up a few steps. “What about the few days after?” The ones where Jeremy had woken up to all the lights on and assumed he'd done it in his sleep, like it hadn't quite sunk in that Parker was dead and he left the lights on so he could find his way home.

 

“Just… Complete blankless. I died, there's nothing for me to remember.”

 

Jeremy sits completely still. “In the first couple days after, I kept forgetting you weren't here. That you wouldn't be here when I woke up and you wouldn't be in your room either. I thought maybe you'd come back as a ghost, haunt me for not saving you.”

 

“For not saving me?” Parker whispers, pity clear on his face. “I don't blame you for what happened, Jeremy.”

 

“If I was here, you wouldn't have died.”

 

“Cib killed me, not you. You don't seriously think I'd haunt you or whatever because you weren't here when I died?”

 

“It seemed plausible.”

 

It really, really did. Every time he woke from a nightmare, he realised that if Parker did come back to haunt him, he wouldn't have blamed him. If he had been there or if he'd been nearby, Parker would be alive; properly, not just the alive version of a necromancer's spell. It seemed plausible, all the time, and the only thing that convinced him that Parker wasn't haunting him was how empty and alone he'd felt in the house.

 

He remembers too many mornings where he'd woken up and left his room expecting Parker to be there, then having to deal with the sinking feeling in his stomach when he'd been suddenly reminded that Parker was dead and not coming back.

 

“I wouldn't haunt anyone.”

 

“Even Cib?”

 

“I honestly don't know.”

 

_

 

 **Google search:** _how to tell if you like someone._

 

_

 

Parker knocks on Jeremy's door that night when he's still getting ready for bed, his curtains open and bedside lamp brightening up the room. Neither of them are in their pajama's but Jeremy still opens the door and let's Parker in, watching carefully the way he has his hands tucked into his jean pockets.

 

“What do you need?” Jeremy asks, turning away from his open door to where Parker's standing not far away.

 

There's a moment where Jeremy wonders if Parker's going to say he's leaving or he's going to find Steve and let him know he's alive, but it passes when Parker turns to look at him, face soft in the dimlight of the lamp in the opposite corner.

 

Jeremy stares and doesn't flinch away when Parker gets close enough to touch.

 

“Just you tonight, Jeremy. You.”

 

_

  
fin.

**Author's Note:**

> my fav boi's :')) but thank u for reading!!! leave a kudos or comment if you feel like it, it's always much appreciated.
> 
> \- rachel.


End file.
